First Love
by peacock blue eyes
Summary: [oneshot][AU] Kairi only wants to be happy for Sora. Even if she's not happy with him. [Sokairi, Kaiora] R&R plz. Undecided about flames...


**SD: **Hi, this was inspired by Hikki's song and the cover of a National Geographic magazine (don't ask; and there is nothing wrong with reading that magazine). And I do not own either one… Beware of sap and anything OOC.

This **_isn't_** a songfic. I needed a good slow song.

And yes! I finished this before the 8th. Ok, I'll shut up now. Please enjoy…hopefully.

_**Disclaimer: **If I owned Kingdom Hearts, we can assume that Nomura has lost his mind. (Add the song to that list)_

**First Love**

Brushing her red bangs from her eyes, Kairi looked up from her notes to listen to what her teacher labeled as '_extremely_ **important**' for their upcoming test. Immediately, as soon as she moved her head, her eyes fell onto a boy with spiky brown hair two seats in front of her.

She mentally cursed the person who sat between them last semester and had recently transferred out, for now she can't concentrate because she has a perfect view of this boy's back. It's not that there was anything special about his back. No, it was _him_ that was the problem.

But she was secretly thankful the once occupied seat was now empty. He can just turn around to talk to her without having to get up and walk those two steps to her desk.

Kairi blushed at her thoughts and tried to focus on the blackboard. The effort proved futile as her eyes don't have the will to tear its view from him.

'_God, Sora…why can't I get you off my mind?'_

* * *

Kairi was convinced that they were just really, _really_ close friends since they were babies. Sure, there were a couple of times they went to dances and parties together but it was only on a friend-to-friend basis. As they entered high school, they started to slowly drift apart. They've had their separate relationships and breakups. But he'd be happy for her when she was happy with someone else. He'd give her his shoulder to cry on when it didn't work between her and that someone else.

Recently, Tidus broke up with her. He was sincerely apologetic about it, so she wasn't so upset. She had always known that his bond with Selphie was something that couldn't be overlooked.

And as soon as the news reached him, Sora called her and asked if she was okay.

'_He's so sweet…'_ She felt guilty. He shouldn't worry for her, especially when he had Yuna to be concerned for. But Yuna understood and that's what Kairi liked about Yuna.

They looked cute together was what she first said to herself. Sora couldn't have picked a better girl to be his girlfriend. She was smart, friendly, pretty…everyone loved Yuna.

Does Sora love Yuna? On a deeper level?

The way they smile at each other…the way they laugh at each other's jokes…

'_She's taking him away from me…'_ Oh, why did she realize it so late? She loved him.

Even before she knew the meaning of love.

Even when she shared her first kiss with Riku. Even when she moved on to be with Tidus. Those feelings she had for Sora, the feelings that were hidden from her, had never left.

But she was determined to not let her emotions get the better of her. She didn't want Sora to be hurt because of her.

'_I just want to be happy for him…'_

* * *

Kairi hates dances. Not because of dancing, because she loves dancing. But because she could never decide on what to wear until the last twenty seconds before she had to leave. Luckily, Yuffie was there to help. However…

"How 'bout this one?" Yuffie held up lilac-colored miniskirt. Kairi shook her head. It was _wwwaaaaayyy_ too eighth grade. The ninja just shrugged and resumed searching Kairi's closet. "I swear, Kairi, if you don't like what you have, I suggest we go shopping."

"Sure…" the redhead agreed absently while drawing circles on her bed with her the tip of her finger. Yuffie was mumbling something about stuffed animals. Not surprising when the closet is 65 filled with those dolls won at the annual fall fair. Sora won that Moogle doll for her two years ago.

'_No! No! No! You're not suppose to be thinking about him! He's going to be at the dance with Yuna so just pay attention to what you're going to wear and have a good time!'_ She never realized how frustrating it was to talk to herself.

"Hello? Kairi, are you in there?"

Something hard poked her forehead. Kairi blinked and yelped when a gigantic chocobo with bright blue eyes was shoved right into her face. Yuffie placed her hands on her hips and shook her head.

"Jeez, what's with you lately? You've been really out of it. Is it a guy?"

Kairi shoved the bird onto the floor and tried to make her laugh sound real. "What makes you think that?"

"Oh, I dunno…maybe because you're _always_ drawing invisible circles whenever you're thinking about a guy?"

"That's so not true."

Yuffie clicked her tongue and shrugged, a sign that she wasn't going to pursue the same pointless argument they've been through many times. "Kairi, I've known you since elementary. I think I would know you well enough to know your habits."

The redhead glanced at the chocobo at her feet. Those sapphire orbs reminded her of Sora's except his were not made out of plastic.

Deep blue and its endless depths. She could stay drowned in them if she wanted to.

"There you go again. Alright, fess up. Who's the boy and is he in our school?"

'_Yuffie honestly knows me too, too well.'_

* * *

She took one glance in the mirror and sighed. This was the best she could do but at least it was something. An azure halter-top and long black dress pants clung fittingly to her figure. Her black, high-heeled sandals made her an inch taller than she was. Small earrings dangled from ears as she applied a little bit of mascara to her eyelashes. 

'_Alright, it's just a dance. I'm dressed, I'm ready, and I'm going to enjoy having my single life back.'_ With one last confident smile to her reflection, she turned to grab her purse and left.

* * *

"Yo, Kairi's here!" Heine called to the others who already arrived. Kairi fiddled with the zipper of her purse as she nervously stepped into the entrance hall, the blast of music at high volume nearly deafening her ears.

"Hey, guys-oof!" She stumbled a little back when about five people glomped her.

"Kairi! I thought you said you weren't going to come," Naminé said as she drew back, straightening her shirt.

"I convinced her to," Yuffie said with a smug looked plastered on her face before grabbing the girl's hand and leading them to the area reserved for their grade. "I see you didn't wear the outfit I picked out for you?"

"Um…hehe…yeah, about that…" Kairi twisted the hem of her halter-top. "Well, my dad would have grounded me if I even thought about wearing it out of the house."

"Hmph, yeah, I believe you."

Pints quickly changed the subject by taking a picture of the huddled group.

"Pints! I wasn't ready!" they all chorused.

"Make way!" Heine yelled as he threw himself onto the couch where they were sitting. The girls gave a yelp and pushed him off, letting him fall onto his butt. "Ouch, what was that for?"

"We love you, Heine!" Orette giggled as she threw a cushion at him.

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Stop abusing me!" Soon, they were all drawn in into the amusement of pelting the poor blonde with cushions. Pints managed to get at least three good pictures before Leon came to break them apart.

"This is fun! We should do this at every dance." Naminé grinned as she passed the photos around. "Oh, Kairi, I've been meaning to talk with you about something."

"Hmm? About what?"

"Wait, first, Heine has to leave."

Heine looked up, faking a shocked expression. "I'm hurt, Nami! How can you say that to your own brother? I'm going to disown you right here, right now."

"This is girl talk, Heine. Now shoo, both you and Pints."

Kairi smiled as she watched the funny scene of the two blondes play fighting with each other. It reminded her about the time she and Riku would gang up on Sora to see if he was really brave enough to climb the highest tree in their neighborhood. Riku called the auburn-haired kid a chicken, resulting in a huge mess of throwing sand at each other.

How she missed those days when they were younger. Just the three of them. Before reality gave them the rude awakening into the lives of teenagers. Speaking of which, where are those two anyways?

"Good, now that they're gone-"

"Have you guys seen Sora?" Kairi blurted out before she could stop herself. Fortunately, the room was dark so no one could see her blush.

"That's just it, Kairi. You see," Yuffie broke off, unsure of how to continue. "Sora…he and Yuna broke up."

Her jaw dropped as she looked from one to the other. Words couldn't seem to find the way to her voice as she stuttered, "B-but…why?"

"Don't know…"

"W-wait, wait, when did this happen?"

Naminé took a deep breath. "I heard Rikku talking to Paine about it yesterday in the bathroom. You know, they're Yuna's closest friends and all. They didn't know I was there so I just listened. I don't think they know who chose to break up first or why but I just know they're not together anymore."

Kairi's eyes widened slightly before she regained her composure. "And Sora?"

"Haven't heard from him all day," Yuffie answered. "Poor Sora. Yuna was his first, too."

'_First? What kind of 'first,' Yuffie?'_ Kairi bowed her head and stared down at her hands. It was clear that everyone was shocked as she was about the breakup. Just a few days ago, they had celebrated their second anniversary. What went wrong?

"We just thought you should know, since you are his closest friend…next to Riku, that is."

"Please don't say anything because no one else is suppose to know."

Kairi nodded, letting all the information seep into her. _'Sora…I have to talk to him.'_

"Well, speak of the devil," Yuffie murmured, looking at the door. Kairi swallowed hard as the brunette walked in with his hands in his pockets, his bangs shadowing his eyes. He was dressed in casual jeans and a short-sleeved navy shirt, which he left the top three buttons unbuttoned to reveal his white undershirt and the silver crown necklace he always wore, along with black sneakers. He avoided making eye contact with anyone and went to a corner to sulk. "And I thought he'd be at home, too."

She wanted, more than anything, to go to him. Comfort him. Ease him of his pain. Anything. Anything for Sora.

"Should I go to talk to him?" she asked, unsure of what to do. Maybe he'd push her away, something she hoped would never happen.

"Yeah, maybe you should. He won't get mad at you if you found out," Naminé reassured.

Suddenly, the loud music stopped and melted into a slow ballad. Wakka, aka the DJ, turned his microphone on and practically yelled through it. "This is for all you lovely couples out there, ya! So girls, grab your boyfriends, drag them onto the floor and start dancin'!"

One by one, every girl with a boyfriend piled onto the floor. Kairi saw this as her chance and made her way to where Sora was standing. As she approached, he turned his head to face her and she instantly froze at the sight of those vibrant blue eyes.

**_Saigo no kisu wa ka ba (The last kiss)_**

**_Tabako no flavor ga shita (Tasted like tobacco)  
Nigakute setsunai kaori (A bitter and sad smell)_**

"Kairi…?"

An uncomfortable lump formed in her throat. She hated this effect he had on her. Quickly, she tried to regain her composure but only managed to stutter. "Um…Sora, I…"

He blinked and the heat in her cheeks seemed to burn.

**_Ashita no imagoro ni wa (Tomorrow, at this time)  
Anata wa doko ni irun darou (Where will you be?)  
Dare wo omotterun darou (Who will you be thinking about?)  
_**

"I, um…I…do you…"

"Want to dance?"

"Yes!" Wait, what? She was going to ask him if he would like to talk. Dread overwhelmed her now that she realized how she reacted to his question. It was no help to refuse now. "Um, yeah…if you want…"

What she didn't expect was to hear him chuckle and feel his hand grab hers, leading her to the dance floor. "Sure…"

Now she found that her arms were around his neck and his around her waist, slowly swaying to the soft rhythm of the song. She blushed deeply at the closeness between them.

**_You are always gonna be my love  
Itsuka dareka to mata koi ni ochitemo (Even if I fall in love with someone once again)  
I'll remember to love you taught me how_**

She loved the faint scent of the shore of his shirt. She loved his firm yet gentle grasp he had on her.

**_You are always gonna be the one  
Ima wa mada kanashii love love songu (It's still a sad love song)  
Atarashii uta utaeru made (Until I can sing a new song)_**

"Hey…Kairi?"

She looked up and gave him a weak smile. "Hmm?"

"Do you…do you know?" Sora didn't meet her eyes, which hurt her. He didn't need to act so hesitant around her. That wasn't the Sora she knew.

"Yeah…yeah, I know. I'm sorry it didn't work out."

**_Tachidomaru jikan ga (The paused time is)  
Ugoki dasouto shiteru (About to start moving)  
Wasuretakunai kotobakari (There's many things I don't want to forget about)_**

Sora tightened his grip, surprising her. "Me…me, too." He turned his gaze onto her own and unbeknownst to both of them, they stopped moving completely. She was mesmerized by the light in his eyes, unable to pull away. Finally, with all the energy she could muster, she smiled.

"Sora, you know you can tell me anything. After all, we're best friends, aren't we?" Saying those words made her heart tear up. She didn't want to only just friends. She wanted to be something more to him. Even if was just once.

**_  
Ashita no imagoro niwa (Tomorrow, at this time)  
Watashi wa kitto naite iru (I will probably be crying)  
Anatawo omotterun darou (I will probably be thinking about you)_**

He was so close to her, she could hardly breathe. His hand came up to brush her shoulder-length hair framing her face.

"…Yeah…just friends." He released her and stepped back. She felt cold all of a sudden. Cold and confused.

"Sora?"

"Kairi, I need to tell you this." The tone of urgency in his voice had her taken aback. He stared at his feet, as if trying to find the right words to say. "I…I always knew Yuna and I can't be together."

'_But wasn't she your first, Sora? Didn't you say you were glad to have someone like her?'_ Kairi felt too numb to utter a sound.

**_You will always be inside my heart  
Itsumo anata dake no basho ga aru kara (You will always have your own place)  
I hope that I have a place in your heart too_**

As if the lyrics of the song aided him, he looked up and stared her straight in the eye. "Because…I couldn't let her take your place."

As soon as those words came out of his mouth, her heart started beating like there was no tomorrow. _'Does he mean…'_

**_Now and forever you are still the one  
Ima wa mada kanashii love love song (It's still a sad love song)  
Atarashii uta utaeru made (Until I can sing a new song)_**

He then smiled warmly at her. The smile that stole her heart. "I just wanted you to know that. I wish I could've told you sooner but I didn't have the courage."

His smile changed to a sheepish grin.

"You'll always be my first, Kairi. My first and only."

**_You are always gonna be my love  
Itsuka dareka to mata koi ni ochitemo (even if I fall in love with someone once again)  
I'll remember to love you taught me how_**

With that, he turned and walked away.**_  
_**

'_Don't let him go!' _her mind screamed. Jolting out of her trance, she made a dash after him, bumping into other people as she ran. "Sora!"

**_You are always gonna be the one  
Mada kanashii love love song (It's still a sad love song)_**

"Sora!" She burst through the doors and saw him about to get into his car. "Sora, you jerk!"

At her outburst, he jumped and hit his head on the rim frame of the door and landed with a _thud_ on the pavement. She didn't waste any time and practically threw herself at him into his arms, burying her face into his shoulder as tears started forming in her eyes.

"Sora…I-I feel the same. I-I've al-always felt the s-same."

_**Now and forever…**_

Sora's eyes widened as he slowly wrapped his arms around her back. It must have been a funny picture. A girl and a boy hugging each other on the ground in the middle of a packed up parking lot next to opened car door.

"Kairi…"

She sniffed and pulled back, wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you." He laughed which also caused her to break into mirth. How long has it been since she's been able to laugh and mean it? She didn't know, but was glad that she could just laugh with him. _'To be with him.'_

Sora got up and held his hand out to her. "C'mon, let's go home."

She smiled and grabbed it. Her feelings no longer bottled up inside. It felt good to be free of that. _'Yes...let's.'_

* * *

**SD:** Ah how crappy crappy crappy crap crap this is. Crash and burn. XP  
It sucked, I know it. I liked it at the beginning, then everything went downhill like _fwoop_ BAM! Yeah…so…I apologize about Wakka. I don't know his character well enough but he suits the role as DJ. And…this being so friggin' sappy. Sappy is like too much syrup. And...my stupid fashion sense! I don't know anything about dressing up (nicely, anyway), and I don't go to dances cuz the ones at my school suck. I'd rather wear pajamas.

What Yuffie meant by 'first' means first girlfriend, just in case that wasn't clear. Poor Yuna, now she can't have Tidus cuz Selphie has him. Oic…I feel like I'm getting addicted to a SoraxYuna shipping now. Maybe I'll write one in the future…if Yuna wasn't such a pixie (KH2).

Again, this isn't a songfic. I just like the song 'First Love' by none other than the awesome Hikki herself and decided to borrow the lyrics. Well, other than that I have nothing else to say. Please leave me a review, some constructive criticism if you can/want. Questions? Feel free to IM me and I promise I'll respond back. Don't know about flames…Anyways, thanks for reading.


End file.
